Troubled Couples
by MISS.SUNNYBAUDELAIRE
Summary: Dark clouds are brewing in the Quiglet and Kladora relationships on the sunny beaches of Fiji. -Kladora with some Quiglet.-


**I know, I should be working on the Isadora Diaries, but I'll get to it later! I promise!**

**I've been wanting to write something besides that story for FOREVER and I'm finally doing it. Plus, I promised to upload an idea like this.**

**So, even though it is LONG overdue, here is my NEW one-shot, dedicated to Pottergirl1: Troubled Couples**

**It doesn't exactly fit the prompt, but hopefully it still fits all the criteria. :)**

**Troubled Couples:**

It was an awfully loverly day on the sunny beaches of Fiji, and the Baudelaires and Quagmires were having a beautiful, peaceful day.

"It's so hot outside!"

"You complain too much!"

"Hey guys, check out my sand kingdom!"

"No one cares about you Duncan!"

Are you people serious?

"Why didn't you bring the ice cream?!"

"You said that _you_ were going to bring it, so I brought the cheese! _Just like you told me to!_"

"What do you mean no one cares about me?!"

Guys I said 'peaceful'.

"It's impossible for my life to be 'peaceful' when Violet's nagging on me like she is all the time!" Quigley exasperated, gesturing wildly towards his girlfriend.

"Well, it's impossible for me to _not_ nag on you when you never do what do I say!" Violet screamed back with fiery eyes.

Duncan jumped in between them and pushed them away from each other hoping to grab their attention.

Because he's an attention hog.

"No I'm not!" Duncan argued with me. Instead of responding, I just turned him back around to the story so that he could step back into character and continue with his hogginess.

"I can't believe you guys don't care about me!" Duncan yelled, disappointment clear in his eyes. "I thought we were family."

Alright, guys, what happened here? I left you all for five minutes to save Sunny from drowning and then come back to see all of you upset and screaming at each other. What the heck happened?

"It's Quigley's fault I'm mad!" Violet blamed, pointing an accusing finger at Quigley. "He didn't bring the ice cream like I told him to."

"You said that _you_ were going to get it!" Quigley yelled in frustration.

Violet placed her hands on her hips and narrowed her eyes at her boyfriend. "Yeah, well, you should know better than anyone that I am forgetful, Quigley!"

Quigley's eyes grew wide in astonishment at her comment. "No, Violet! Actually, you're not! _That's me!_" Violet opened her mouth to argue, but Quigley wasn't finished. "You should count yourself lucky that I remembered to bring the cheese! _Just like you said!_"

"I'm allergic to cheese!" Violet blurted harshly.

"No!" Quigley protested with clear frustration. "You're allergic to peppermint!"

"Cheese? Peppermints? What's the difference?!" Violet yelled, throwing cheese in random directions.

"I'm the difference!" Duncan piped up.

"_No one asked you!_" Quigley and Violet yelled to Duncan in unison. Duncan pouted at his the couple's harshness before he stammered a comeback. "Well, I didn't hear anyone ask you two to fight! You two are, like, the _worst_ couple ever! Ever since we got here all you two have ever done is fight. Actually that's what you do wherever you go! And you _never_ bother to compromise. Instead of just screaming at each other, why don't you _talk_ it through instead?"

Duncan's right, you two. That much fighting is _not_ good for a relationship.

Violet gaped at me. "Did you just say Duncan was right? _Duncan?_"

Quigley crossed his arms, looking offended. "What? Are you saying my brother can't be right?"

Okay, I'm not letting you two fight again. Separate and cool down.

"How do you expect me to cool down?!" Violet screamed.

Just do what Sunny's doing.

I gestured to Sunny, who was lying on her back in the sand with her eyes closed.

Probably reevaluating her life since she almost drowned.

Quigley looks at me with disapproval. "That looks really lame."

Fine, you can observe Klaus and Isadora then. They're the complete opposite of you two.

"Who was she?!"

"I don't know!"

"Why don't you know?!"

"Because I never knew about her!"

"Well she seems to know you!"

Are you serious?

Klaus puts his hands on Isadora's shoulders. "I promise, Iz, I've never seen her before in my life before today!"

"How do you expect me to believe_ that_?" Isadora asked with annoyance clear in her tone as she crossed her arms and rolled her eyes. "She knew _exactly_ who you were!"

Guys, come on! I would expect more from Kladora. What's your deal?

"Klaus has been cheating on me with some chick named Cassie!" Isadora blurted in an accusing manner.

"No I haven't!" Klaus argued. "I don't know her at all!"

"Wait, what actually happened here?" Duncan asked.

Isadora narrowed her eyes at Klaus as she answered Duncan's question. "Klaus and I were taking a romantic stroll by the water when some girl comes up to Klaus and asks him, 'So Klaus, are you coming to my party?' and he says, 'Yeah! I am! And then-"

"Wait a minute; that is _not_ what happened!" Klaus interrupted before Isadora could continue. "I said, 'No, who are you?' and she said 'Don't you remember? I'm your Cassie!' Then I said, 'Sorry, you must have the wrong Klaus.' But then she said, 'No I'm not. You're my Klaus Baudelaire! See you tonight!' And then she walked away, leaving me as confused as Isadora."

"Oh, please, you know who she was!"

"No, I swear I don't!"

"Cassie sounds really creepy," Quigley stated, creeped out at how Cassie knew Klaus. "Maybe she was just a stalker?"

"No!" Isadora disagreed. "He's cheating on me; I can feel it in my bones!"

Honestly, Isadora, I thought you'd trust your boyfriend than that.

"Yeah, me too," Klaus grumbled.

"Why are you insisting he's cheating on you?" Duncan asked, suddenly sitting in a chair with glasses on holding a pen and notebook. "Tell everything to your big brother!"

Even better, tell Klaus. Communication is very important in a relationship.

Duncan glared at me and threw his pen at my head.

Ignoring the fist fight that broke out between Duncan and me because of his ignorant idea to throw something at me, Klaus took Isadora's hand and said softly, "Yeah, Isadora, please tell me why."

"Because," she began. Then, taking her hand from his and gesturing wildly with it, she turned her back to him and said, "Because she's pretty!"

Klaus was silent as he waited for her to continue, but she never did.

"Really?" He asked slowly. "That's all?"

"Well, _yeah_," Isadora mumbled, slowly turning back to face him.

Klaus threw his head back and laughed. He laughed so hard he almost fell over. "I'm sorry! I ju-I can't believe that's it!"

Isadora crossed her arms and was about to say something mean, but Klaus began speaking again before she could. "You don't need to worry about _that_! Sure she was pretty, but you're beautiful on the inside _and _out. I'm crazy about you! Why would I ever want to be with anyone else?"

Anyone could see how taken aback Isadora was. She and Klaus had only been together for a few weeks and, out of pure awkwardness, hadn't spoken openly of their feelings towards each other. So Isadora didn't really know how to respond. After a moment of silence, Isadora threw herself on top of him, bringing him into a hug. "I'm sorry I doubted you!" she said into his shoulder.

A sniffle was heard beside them, and they semi-broke apart to see where it had come from.

The noise had come from Quigley who was holding a tissue to his nose. "It's just so beautiful!" He cried blowing his nose. "Don't judge me!"

Violet wrapped an arm around Quigley and nodded her agreement in an understanding manner. "Get me a tissue from my purse, Duncan!" Violet ordered, startling Quigley for a moment. "I'm going to cry!"

Duncan sat in the sand repeatedly clicking his pen. "Why should I get tissue for someone who doesn't care about me?"

"_Duncan!_" Violet screamed louder, making Quigley jump again. Duncan, however, was surprisingly unfazed. "Nope. I want an apology."

Violet sighed. "I'm sorry, Duncan. I didn't mean to take out my anger on you earlier. Now will you _please_ get me some tissue from my purse?"

Duncan jumped up happily. "I forgive you! Give me a minute."

"_KLAUS?!"_

Everyone turned to see the girl who had screamed Klaus's name sprinting down to the beach towards Klaus and Isadora. "What are you doing hugging _her?!_" she screamed, pulling him away from Isadora.

"Cassie," Klaus began, putting an arm back around Isadora. "I'd like you to meet my _girlfriend_."

"_Girlfriend?!_" Cassie cried angrily. "You're cheating on me?!" With a quick, swift movement, Cassie knocked Klaus on the ground with a punch to his face. "And if it wasn't already clear, you are uninvited to my party. Oh, and we're over!" And with that, she sashayed away.

What a weirdo.

Isadora laid Klaus on a beach towel and began nursing his new black eye.

"Well if that wasn't incredibly random, then I have no idea what anything is anymore,"Quigley said as he wiped some left over Kladora tears.

"Um, Violet?" Duncan called from a few feet away by Violet's purse. "I think you _did_ bring the ice cream."

Violet and Quigley frowned in confusion. Violet spoke up, "What do you mean?"

Duncan picked up Violet's purse and turned it over, dumping out everything inside, including a creamy white liquid that had also covered everything that had fallen out.

Quigley raised an eyebrow at Violet. "You put the ice cream in your purse?"

Violet cringed. "Sorry?"

Quigley smiled. "It's okay; we all know you're crazy."

"Exactly!" Violet exclaimed, hugging him.

"Hey," Isadora piped up, "Klaus and I saw a really cool ice cream shoppe in town. We could go there."

"Yeah, and I could use something cold," Klaus agreed, holding his injured eye.

"Yeah, let's go!" Violet exclaimed, pulling Quigley up and running towards town. Isadora helped Klaus up and Duncan got Sunny and the four of them tried to keep up with Violet and Quigley.

And they all went to get ice cream and lived happily ever after on the sunny beaches of Fiji.

The End!

**Did I do okay :) Post some feedback, and thanks for reading! :)**

**"It's funny, or at the time I was employed in the office of inventions, I wondered what our world would look like if I moved at the speed of light going up on a motorcycle ..."**

**~ Translation to the beginning of "Over Lionsgate City" by Port Blue**

**Bye you wonderful beings! :D**

**;)**


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